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#167. Authenticity vs. Belonging

  • Kate Snowise
  • Podcast

In this episode, we’re addressing the tension or challenge between meeting two human needs, Authenticity and Belonging. Kate overviews the concept of Authenticity and then illustrates . . .

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About Kate Snowise


Hi, I’m Kate. I’m a Psychologist turned Executive Coach who is obsessed with the human condition and the things that help us feel fulfilled in life. I host the Here to Thrive ® podcast, adore Corgis, love Psychology, Self-Care and Sleep, and refuse to take life too seriously. You can check out my Coaching & Consulting site at: www.thrive.how

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A friendly reminder that life is hard, and we can’ A friendly reminder that life is hard, and we can’t always see someone’s struggles on the outside…

We may never know how much someone needs our kindness, or the impact of our smile, or what pausing to genuinely acknowledge someone does to their spirit. 

Life can hurt. But kindness is like a sweet balm that makes it just a little bit better. 

This gorgeous image from -
@murphys_sketches Thursday thoughts 💭 
Kindness is always the best policy. ❤️

#bekind #heretothrive
These were the awards I used to pretend I wasn’t c These were the awards I used to pretend I wasn’t chasing … but oh, I was. 

I was caught in the trap of “hustling for my worthiness” as Brene Brown so aptly phrases it.

Thinking that somehow continually checking all of these boxes, and getting the invisible prizes would make me feel whole, fulfilled and happy …

🫥 

But it’s a broken recipe. Hustling for your worthiness only pulls you down into a cycle of never enoughness. 

It will never be enough to fill you up, and fulfill you. You’ll be left in a cycle of the endless hustle.

And exhausted.

Turning away from the invisible prizes feels strange and scary no doubt. When it’s been the way you’ve approached the world for so long, it feels dangerous to think about doing things differently. 

But it’s also liberating and freeing. 

And even though we’ve been programmed to believe these lead to success, in my experience I’ve found the exact opposite to be true.

When you’re a stronger and clearer version of you, success finds you, authentic love and care finds you, and ultimately fulfillment will find you. 

You will never find your worthiness when you’re stuck in the trap of hustling for it. That’s not where it lives. 

It lives within each of us. Not out there in the world of the invisible awards. 

#heretothrive #hustlingforworthiness #selfcarequotes #restrevolution #beyou❤️
We’re obsessed with being productive . . . Have y We’re obsessed with being productive . . .

Have you noticed this in yourself? Only giving yourself permission to rest when you’ve earned it? 

The thing is, we’re not machines. We actually need to be energized to do our very best work. We don’t function as well on a 20% charge as we do when we’re 80% restored. 

Let this little love note in your feed today be a permission slip to not use rest as a reward, but to see it as the vital downtime your human body and mind need to be at their best. 

Far from rocket science, but shockingly tricky with you’ve been wired to treat yourself the exact opposite way. 

Take care of yourself friends. That’s your job 💕

From @nicolajanehobbs

#restrevolution #heretothrive #bekindtoyourself #selfcarequotes
We all deserve rest. Our spirits are so tired. We We all deserve rest.

Our spirits are so tired. We live in a crazy, intense, chaotic and exhausting world. 

But sleep isn’t all we need. It’s not enough by itself. 

Depending on our unique natures, we will need a mix of the following ingredients that were outlined by Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith. 

- physical rest
- mental rest
- emotional rest
- sensory rest
- creative rest
- social rest
- spiritual rest

As a doctor, she saw so many burnt out patients but noted that they didn’t all need the same thing - and she outlined 7 types of rest. 

In my work I’ve noted that more often than not, it’s not a physical energy that needs to be restored, but something else. Our life forces become drained. 

Google - TED 7 Types of Rest to learn more, or you can listen to my conversation with her on the Here to Thrive Podcast. 

#restrevolution #heretothrive #burnoutcure #burnout #burnoutrecovery #rest #restandrenew #deepenandrenew
- Boundaries are the distance at which I can love - Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me all at the same time -

This is it. Boundaries are necessary and healthy. 

They keep us out of building and harboring resentment, and create the space for true authenticity in relationships.

As Brene Brown so aptly puts it - We need to belong to ourselves first, and betray ourselves last - (from her podcast)

❤️

Image via @drjamesrouse. More importantly quote us originally from @prentishemphill prentishemphill 

#heretothrive #boundariesarehealthy #boundaryquotes #chooseyourself #authenticity
The best things in life are the simple things. The The best things in life are the simple things. The little things. The moments.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the pursuit of more . . . of happier . . . of someday.

And the tragedy is that if we only put our focus on the future, it can rob us of the immense joy that can be found in noticing and appreciating the sweet and simple things that we already have.

Gratitude is a central tenet in #positivepsychology . . . and while I’m all about acknowledging the big things we’re grateful for, I always encourage my clients to pay keen attention and to look out for the fleeting little things in our everyday experience . . . and to celebrate them.

Maybe that’s appreciating the magic of watching a flame dance in your fireplace 🔥 

Or watching a snowflake float through the air ❄️ 

Or spending a moment laughing as your dog leaps through the snow full of pure elation 🐶 

There is joy to be found in every single day, but you have to paying attention to find it ❤️

Beautiful image by @wordsforintroverts. 

#heretothrive #wordsforintroverts #livetoday #simplethings #simplethingsinlife
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