• May 2021: Life Lessons

    Perspective is one of our greatest abilities. We can intentionally choose to shift our perspective, and look at things differently. One of my favorite perspective shifts when trudging through the crap of difficult times is to stop, and look for the life lessons, and ask: what is life trying to teach me right now? 

     

    Thoughts from Kate:

    When we get stuck in our automatic and unconscious reactions, we give our power away. Our mindsets can be used to literally change our perspective on the world. The world doesn’t have to change, but we can change the way we look at the world – and therein lies our power. This is why I love psychology so much! 

    Here are some thoughts on treating life like a school:

    • We’re all students of life. There is a humbleness and openness that accompanies this perspective. If you choose to entertain the idea that perhaps we’re all here in a soul-school of sorts, then we’re all students. We’re all learning. We just each have different lessons we’re attempting to master…but no-one is immune to having to learn lessons. 
    • Growth doesn’t stop. A theme that has been consistently coming up for me lately is to recognize that our personal growth is about becoming, growing and unfolding…but there is no destination to arrive at. As long as we are alive, there will be lessons to learn. This acknowledgement is freeing. We don’t have to sprint to a destination, because life will show up with the next lesson to learn as soon as we arrive, so we may as well enjoy the journey. 
    • Your willingness to learn is everything. Whether or not you subscribe to this belief, you will hit hurdles in life. Your willingness to look for the lessons is the crucial element that can change how you experience your life. It’s the difference between seeing life as an opportunity or an obstacle.

     

    Quotes to Inspire:

    • “Instead of ‘why is this happening?’ try ‘what is this teaching me? – Unknown
    • “You will be presented with lessons: You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called ‘life.’ Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or hate them, but you have designed them as part of your curriculum.” – Cherie Carter-Scott
    • “Most adults have dropped out of the school of life before they reached adulthood.”Mokokoma Mokhonoana
     

    Something to Try: Reflection

    Find a quiet time and some space, and open up a notebook. Consider the life lessons you’ve been learning over the last year, and how you’ve grown. You can use the following journal prompt to get you started?
    • What is a Life Lesson I’ve been working through or faced over the last 12 months?
    • What have I learned? 
    • What do I still need to be aware of? 
    • What actions can I take that will help me continue to evolve?

     

    Be different than the rest. Don’t be a life-school dropout. Sign up, look closely, and evolve alongside this thing called life. It’s soul-satisfying if you ask me 😉

    – Kate

     

    p.s. If you’d like to dive a little deeper into this perspective shift, you can listen to episode #152 of the Here to Thrive podcast. Find it online here: 

  • Mar 2021: Self Inquiry

    If you’ve followed me for awhile, you may have noticed a consistent theme.

    I firmly believe that self-reflection, and taking the time to get to know ourselves, our wants and our drivers, is the vital knowledge that allows us to build a meaningful and fulfilling life.  

    Thoughts from Kate:

    I didn’t used to believe I had intuition. I thought that was something that psychic people were blessed with. I couldn’t have been more wrong…I simply wasn’t taking any time to quieten the noise of the crazy outer world, and intentionally tune into that whispering inner voice that we all have. 

    Here are my thoughts on what you can do to help foster this crucial relationship with yourself:

    • Ask Big Questions. If you were getting to know a new date, you’d ask them lots of questions. The same works for knowing ourselves – ask yourself the big questions, and simply see what is there. 
    • Create Quiet Contemplative Space. The outside world is noisy, and our inner wisdom is quiet. If you’re always distracting yourself with noise, you’ll likely never hear it. 
    • Make self-reflection a regular practice, not a one time event. You have to invest in the relationship you have with yourself. 

     

    Quotes to Inspire:

     
    • “Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.” – Margaret J. Wheatley
    • “Don’t become too preoccupied with what is happening around you. Pay more attention to what is going on within you.” – Mary-Frances Winters
    • “The soul usually knows what to do it heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind.” – Caroline Myss

     

    Something to Try:

    To complete this monthly theme, on the Here to Thrive podcast I spoke with Jennie Lee about how engaging with meaningful questions can help us to connect spiritually. Her new book – Spark Change – is one of my favorites from the last several years.

    She graciously said I could share a page with you. Here is Question 74 that you can use as a journal prompt: What is preventing me from being quiet inside? (click to download the page) 

    Have fun getting to know yourself even better. It’s worth it. 

    – Kate

    p.s. If you’d like to hear the interview with Jennie for a little extra inspiration, head here: www.heretothrive.com/podcast149

  • Feb 2021: Connection

    Hi Friends, 

    Let’s be real. Human connection is one of the things that has suffered immensely during the weirdness that is this pandemic world.

    Will we ever feel as comfortable among strangers again? Will we go back to shaking hands and politely hugging acquaintances when we see them?

    I’m not sure. But what I do know is that it helps our well-being to consider what connection really means and how we can foster it. Here are some thoughts to consider and inspire you. 

    Thoughts from Kate:

    Being connected to one another is a fundamental human need. We crave social bonds, even if we’re introverted. Closeness and being a human alongside other humans feeds us. 

    So what can we do to foster connection with others? Here are some of my thoughts:

    • Prioritize connection. Look for ways to genuinely warm up the day of another. A friendly text, a short call, a note of gratitude, a bunch of flowers. Remember to stay connected. 
    • Spread positive vibes. Compliment people. Smile more. Put yourself out there and say something positive to a stranger. As well as boosting their energy, it will boost yours. 
    • Practice interpersonal courage. Be willing to start the conversation, ask for a phone number, invite someone into your home or to go for a walk. It may feel uncomfortable. You may feel totally dorky. But the potential payoff is worth the discomfort. 

     

    Quotes to Inspire:

    • “Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow.” – Brene Brown
    • “The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention… A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words.” – Rachel Naomi Remen
    • “Each contact with a human being is so rare, so precious, one should preserve it.” – Anais Nin
    • “A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. The delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves form this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” – Albert Einstein. 

     

    Something to Try:

    • Grab a piece of paper or open a notes page on your phone. 
    • Without over-thinking it, write down the names of 3-8 people who matter to you, who you care about. For whatever reason. Trust if their name pops onto the list. 
    • Make a point to connect with each of them this week, or do something uniquely special to show them how much you care. Send them a card, flick them a text, write them a Facebook message, write them a gratitude note, send them flowers just to say you care. 
    • Watch the positive vibes and feelings of connection flow…all because you started it. 
     

    Till next month, keep thriving. 

    – Kate

    p.s. This is a once a month resources that drops on the last day of the month for the Here to Thrive community to help you ponder, consider and act on the deeper aspects of life. If you’re not yet signed up, use the link below to make sure yours arrives in your inbox next month!

  • Jan 2021: Adulting

    Adulting is:

    the practice of behaving in a way characteristic of a responsible adult, especially the accomplishment of mundane but necessary tasks.” (Oxford Languages Dictionary)

     

    We are increasingly living in a society that celebrates immediate gratification. I’m also a “path-of-least-resistance” type person. If I had my way I would throw far too many things into the “too hard basket” pile and be done with it. Screw adulting. But as I’ve matured I’ve realized that this is not the path to the good life. It only makes life harder in the long run.

     

    So what does take us closer to a good life? Here are some of my thoughts:

    • The things we avoid are often the very things that need to be done.
    • Chipping away at our adult-problems gives us momentum, and momentum always feels better than inaction.
    • That the best cure for anxiety is working towards a solution that alleviates our stress.

     

    We can’t control everything, but if we put in a little forethought, a good dose of effort, and decide we’re going to step-up and take responsibility for our lives…we can also take care of a lot more than we might otherwise give ourselves credit for.

     

    Quotes to Inspire:

    • “I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone and ignore them like all other adults.” – Unknown (note to self: don’t follow the lead of other adults in this regard).
    • “Taking responsibility for oneself is by definition an act of kindness.” – Sharon Salzberg
    • “During a very busy life I have often been asked, “How did you manage to do it all?” The answer is very simple. It is because I did everything promptly.” – Richard Tangye
    • “Procrastination is the lazy cousin of fear. When we feel anxiety around an activity, we postpone it.” – Noelle Hancock

     

    Something to Try:

    • Grab a piece of paper or open a notebook.
    • Put a line horizontally down the middle of a page.
    • On the left-hand side, write a list of all the things that are stressing you out, or are taking up space in the back of your head.
    • On the right-hand side next to each stressor, make a note of an action you could take to resolve it, or move closer to working out how to make it better (or make yourself feel better).
    • Do the actions you have listed on the right-hand side.

    This is called problem-focused coping and it’s very adulty. It highlights the things you can do to relieve the pressure in your life. It isn’t full proof, but more often than not there is something we can do to make most the things that stress us out a little less stressful. 

     

    Till next month, keep thriving. 

    – Kate